I MAKE IT RAIN

Happy Birthday Kim!

Hand over the nug, Arsenio. We've got to smoke

What am I going to do?

Fuck. Golum is having a 420 party too. It is gonna be off da hook! Paul Atreides, j's of weed, and a mushroom bong.

THE DUNEIVERSE IS COMING TO AN END

"Paul Atreides, you will never become the Muad'Dib unless you trade me that dankazz j of weed for this burrito with special sauce."

"Fuuuuuck."

Let's Chill!

I am not normally an advocate for Jeff Foxworthy but in this instance I have to stand up for him. Foxworthy was just tryin to chill with Kim Jong Il and offered him some of his signature peppered Beef Jerky and a j of chronic and Il was like, "Fuck that, let's box," and whatever. Now I am the referee but it's all pretty dank cuz I'm mackin on some of that jerky and it is the SHIT! (Not to mention the weed.)

Scary Movie Night

Weed Included.

This one sucks ass

Still gonna see that shit

PAYLOAD: LINCOLN MARK LT, SUCKING SHIT

SO me and John wilkes booth were cruising in his lincoln mark lt on a fine Sunday afternoon to catch an opera matinee when John was like, "Let's see where I factor in with the payload challenge," and I was like, "shit's over homeboy truck month was last month" but he was allfuckin like "FUCK YOU" and pointed his revolver at me and I was like "Is this really happening" and he's all "this really means a lot to me" so I said whatever bro lets fucking start shovelling this grow room into your truck and JWB is all smiley and shit and then I knew he was joking because it was a ceramic revolver bong and I took a massive rip and jumped out the door. Judging by the marijuana loaded into the bed, I'd say the Lincoln clocked in at around 1865 lbs that motherfucker making me ruin my sunday oh well at least the weed we smoked was fucking CHOICE and now I am going to assasssinate the assassin fucking idiot

NUGGETZZ: A THEOREM

"Hey Walter Benjamin?" "Yes, Theodor Adorno?" "Do you want to hang out in some arcades and discuss the tenets of dialectical materialism (while smoking weed)?" "Why yes sir, as history is the cumulative effect of class struggles coupled with physical matter -- the beginning and end of everything -- then progress necessitates repetition." "Ah, and the culture industry manipulates the general public, engendering consent in docility. The same thing is offered to everybody by the standardized production of consumption goods." "Yeah, fuck this." "Let's go listen to Juvenile."

DA BLUNTWIN BROS.

So me Billy, Alec, and Daniel were chillin in the Bluntwin Bros. Secret Grow Room last night when Stephen called up and said "Whats up?" and Billy was like, "Fuck you, snitch,"and then Stephen called the cops and shut down the Dankest Grow Room in New Jersey or something but I escaped and am going to free those motherfuckers so we can make movies and shit

American Heroes pt. II

Dude last weekend me and Pharoh Ramses (the blunted) were chillin at the gangsta bbq when Pharoh, His Dankness, reaches into his sarcophogus and pulls out the phattest papyrus blunt from 420 BC (before criminalization). Homeboy lights that shit up with his eternally flaming waterproof matches and passes that shit to a mummy, then DJ Drama, and then fucking narc-ass Super Mario, who does not know how to chill, so the mummy and Pharoh Ramses stick their sick-ass pitbulls on his guido ass, and then the bbq resumes, with the choicest herbal rubs on rack of lamb, corn on the fucking cob, 69 alarm chili, way more bluntz, and lemonade it was one of the best days of my life

American Heroes pt. I

Most of us remember William Howard Taft as that asshole who got his fat ass stuck in the bathtub, but it turns out homeboy was just WAY too blazed to get out of that tub and he was having a fuckin dank ass pizza delivered and really had no reason to move a muscle. Taft also furnished the dankest bedroom in the white house with some choice Zeppelin blacklight posters, a grow room in the closet, the Three 6 Mafia discography, a sick arsenal of bongs, and that lamp that's ill as fuck. I'm going over there later today so we can roll a fat ass j (of weed)

Dudez, the wait for a top-quality walk-in bong is nearly over!!!

This is still in Developmental Stages, but Dank Nuggettzz has had an exclusive preview to NASA's new walk in bong, code-named 2001: A Dank Oddysey. There are still a few kinks to work out, but initial tests are promising, and shit will get you blunted as fuck

LEE HARVEY OSWALD, MARIJUANA'S ORIGINAL MARTYR

You may think Lee Harvey Oswald was the greatest snitch of all time for icing one of our dankest presidents, JFK, but Oswald was actually the leader of an influential legalization movement, Dankboyz 4:20 Stamina Stoned for Universal Bong Rips, so snitch ass Jack Ruby is a fuckin narc for putting a bullet in that goblin bong. What a fuckin shitty day

Dude this weed feels like a gunshot straight to the dome!!!

LIKE A FUCKING ROCK (OF CHRONIC)

Dudez the results are in, Ford just got owned!!! A raised 1984 Chevy Silverado was taken to the fucking limit, which happens to be a 7700 lb. nugget payload limit. Can Mazda step to the plate?

SNITCH!